When Not to Ask for a Selfie With a Star

Sharon Stone poses with a guest at the Astra Awards

Asking for a photo at a formal event can be tricky.

On one hand, these moments feel special. On the other, the setting matters. Context matters. Timing matters.

Knowing when not to ask is just as important as knowing when it might be appropriate.

Remember why the person is there

At awards shows and galas, most recognizable faces are attending in a professional capacity. They may be nominated, presenting, supporting a colleague, or honoring a cause.

That means their attention is often divided. They may be preparing for the stage, responding to media, or managing a tight schedule.

If someone is mid-conversation, eating, or moving quickly between obligations, that is not the moment.

The table is not the place

A seated table is a private zone, even in a public room.

If someone is sitting down, especially during dinner or a program, it is best to leave them undisturbed. Approaching a table for a photo can disrupt not just one person, but everyone around them.

Even if the person seems relaxed, it is worth waiting until the room transitions to a more social moment.

Watch for natural openings

The best time to ask is when the environment signals openness.

Standing in a foyer. Mingling during a reception. Pausing between conversations. These moments suggest availability without interruption.

Body language matters. Eye contact, a relaxed posture, a smile. These cues often indicate whether an interaction would be welcome.

Keep the ask simple and respectful

If you do ask, keep it light and brief:

• “Would you mind a quick photo?”

• “If not, no worries at all.”

Offering an easy out is a sign of respect, not insecurity.

If the answer is no, accept it warmly. A gracious response leaves a better impression than the photo ever could.

Sometimes the moment is the memory

Not every interaction needs documentation. Certainly not a selfie, photo or video.

Some of the most meaningful moments at events happen quietly. A shared laugh. A kind exchange. A brief acknowledgment.

Those moments still count, even if they stay off camera.

Why this matters

Knowing when not to ask shows social awareness. It signals that you understand the room, the moment, and the people in it.

That awareness builds confidence. It helps you feel at ease in formal spaces without needing proof of belonging.

And that is often what people remember most.

I'm a member of the Hollywood Creative Alliance, which hosted the Astra Awards on January 9, 2026 at the Sofitel in Hollywood. Prior to the event, the membership office sent an email to everyone with the details of the event, and it included an admonition about photos: "Please refrain from hounding talent for photos. We encourage engaging in respectful, meaningful conversation instead." I like that.

Enjoy yourself at the next event, and take home the memory of being in the moment, whether there is a photo or not...

Warmly,

Edie Ellis

The Gala Girl